Dating!

Is been a while since my last post. yes i've been very busy working and DATING!

A few months ago, i start dating again, i found myself dating 3 guys at the same time. well at the beginning it was just sex (what a whore) but since im single why not? right now im down just to one. im dating exclusively one guy.

He's older, of course, look snice. sometimes i dont like the way he dress but that's not important. we met almost 2 months ago at the gym, and yes we had sex the same night, for me it was a one night stand, but then he called the next day, so we were on a few dates, sex and sleep overs.

I told him that i want to get my master degree in a couple fo years in europe, and then one noght, after sex, he started alking about relationships, that he was scared because he wants to settle down but i'll be gon ein 3 years and blah blah blah. WTF? i just met him!

I have to say it, I like the guy, he's a catch, but i'm not ready for that kind of commitment with someone i just met, anyway he went on vacation, but we havent had sex, since then, we talk all the time, he even picked me up at work sometimes.

yesterday, he told me that he's gonna be really busy this semester, cuz he just got a promotion he's taking an mba , so he wont time a lot of time to be with someone. i'm ok with that, i mean, i dont need to be guy with me all the time, i've been single for a long time, but even he's busy, i would like to spend some of his free time with him, going to bed together, but since we are just doing that, i dont feel like i have the right to even discuss how he spends his time.

am i asking for much too soon?

Queer economics

It's being 3 weeks by now since i started working as a professional, OMG time goes by so fast. a month ago when i wasnt doing anything else, i read a book names Queer Economics, it's a compilation of different papers and articles in the field. I'm not a economist so i found it very academic, almost like a text book. but it has very intersting articles, about gay demographics, urban studies and stuff like that.

since i just become independent, i realize how life change trough the years and the stage of our life, yesterday night i went to "chase" a trendy bar here in bogota. after a said hello to my friends i noticed we were all in shirts and v necks.

Somehow we stop buying embroidered xs tshirts and low rise jeans to buy shirts, pants and suits. Now i have to worry with bills, budgets and savings, and priorizing what to buy first. or how to spend the income...

Well i guess this is part of the process and right now i couldnt feel better ihave acomplished one of my goals.. being totally independent from my parents!

the gay guy's love coach!

A few weeks ago, i got a direct message on twitter, it was from Greg Halpen, the gay guy's love coach, he has a web site, a "book", a phone line, even bootcamps to help you, or me, to get A Unique Step-by-Step Approach on How to Live Free From Bad Dating, How to Be More Confident, and How to Move Past Your Own Dating Limitations So You Can Create a Winning Love Life.

I have to admit I was curious at the begining, i mean, the whole idea sounds tempting, so i read it, it was very boring. so thats why i'd decided i'm not gonna write about that anymore!

a friend? where?

This saturday is love and friendship day here in colombia, is something like valentines day for the rest of the world. after reading tons of gay guys online profiles it seems that we are looking for friends as much as sex, and bfs.

but is finding a friend harder than a boyfriend?

when i first moved to bogota i hardly new a couple of friends here int the city, and only one was gay, i started meeting new people trough him, but not actually friends, at same time, i was looking for a boyfriend, i used to log on gay.com, gaydarguys.com and all types of websites as well as socialnetworks like hi5.com, after a couple of years i had 3 boyfriends and only 1 friend.

was i looking in the wrong place? maybe, but the real question is what are we looking in our friends?

living in a plastic society, like the gay community, most of the time finding love is like filling a check list, what he wears, how much he earns, where does he live, is he good looking, how is his body, do my friends like him.. and many more. but what about friends? is sad, but is the same! somehow gay guys stop looking for friends that they can rely on, or laugh and cry with.

a friendship according to wikipedia (i cant believe im quoting this) "connotes a relationship which involves mutual knowledge, esteem, affection, and respect along with a degree of rendering service to friends in times of need or crisis. Friends will welcome each other's company and exhibit loyalty towards each other, often to the point of altruism. Their tastes will usually be similar and may converge, and they will share enjoyable activities. They will also engage in mutually helping behavior, such as the exchange of advice and the sharing of hardship"

within the years i found that there a different types of friends, the ones that you fuck and then become friends (fuck buddies), the ones to go to parties and clubs with, the ones from school (study friends), the ones that approach you becuz you have something they want or desire (wannabe friends, facebook friends (you dont even know them) and of course the ones that really cares about you, and want the best of you, the ones that you call your bff, and no matter what they will aways be there to support you.

have a happy love and friendship day, tell your friends how much do you care about them and love them, and remember that at the end, friends are the only ones who stay, boyfriends come and go.

toodles,

guylian

Got Milk?

A few days ago I went to a dinner party at a friend house, food was awsome, we started dancing drinking gin, aguardiante, anyway... we were having fun, it was a mixed crowd, some how we endend talking about sex, life, relationships and more, as people talk, i realized how many lies you can say in 3 hours, and to your friends!

We all lie, to make our stories sound better, about brands, how many guys we slept with, and so on. we live ina world of fakeness, fake louis vuitton purses everywhere, fake bodies, fake personalities, fake hair, fake foods and fake orgasms.

For a long time we all know, that 70% of women have faked an orgasm at least once during sex, and since tv shows, movies and magazine make it "normal" we dont even care about that fact. but when guys start doing it and talking about it?

Male ejaculation usually accompanies orgasm, so that's why i was so hard to do it, i'm not going to try to explain why we do it. it's a fact. guys fake it too. no matter if you are gay or not. but how can you do it? i found two ways to do it. and it just depends if you are being a top or a bottom.

if you are topping is easier, and condom revolution make it popular. if you cum inside your partner and you are wearing a condom he wouldnt know if you came or not. so all you have to do is take it off and throw it away asap. but in the other hand, if you're getting fucked, you have to use your imagination here. well most of the time the top can see when you cum. and if you are strocking your dick and cant cum that can be very dissapointed, so use your saliva. al you have to do is spit in your hand, make the movements, the sounds, and if you rub your saliva in your stomach it would look like you cum a little bit and is all messy.

I've done both and trust me it works, i didnt feel good, but at least i made a guy happy :)

toodles,

guylian

The Ugly Truth

I was 13 when I had my first sexual contact with a man, I freaked out, and I only felt his dick trough his jeans, after that I realized that something was wrong, was I a freak? was I going to hell? and lots of questions were running trough my mind. So I start looking for answers, but where? For obvious reasons I couldn't talk to anyone, all I heard my whole life is that you couldnt be gay, and the "only" gay person i actually knew was my mother hairstylist.

About that same time I got the best thing ever, internet access in my own house. How brilliant, my older brother didn't care about it, my baby sister was to small to use it, and my parents, they didnt even know how to use a computer. lucky me. well the thing is that one day i found myself in a gay chat, it was amazing, gay porn pictures, other gay guys, people from my country, my city, guys my age, well I have to admit that I used to say I was older and even used a different email address and profile.

Being different is very hard, and growing up being different is even worst. People calling you names, rejecting you, and laughing at you. I used to cried a lot when i was in high school, i mean who wouldnt? anyway, that only made me stronger and by the time i graduated from high school i wasnt only the best student but i was very popular too.

A month after graduation i went to a diferent city, that's were i met Juan, i met him at the airport and a week after i called him, he picked me up and tooked me to his apartment. i knew where all this was going, i was scare to death, so we started kissing and giving each other blow jobs, and then he asked what do you like? so i was a top, but the first time. the result? it was awful i didnt like it at all. but that's a story for another time. A couple of hours later, i face the ugly truth: i was gay! but if i was gay, why i didnt like it? why i didnt feel nice? why i didnt enjoy it?

Well i discovered the answers after a couple of years. i was too scare, too nervous and was a gay in denial. As soon as I accepted myself a gay guy i was able to enjoy sex!

Toodles,

guylian

FYI

For your information if you are not familiar with english acronyms. I'm a spanish native speaking guy, but im writing in english because i hope this blog becomes international some day!

Who am i? as gg says thats a secret i'll never tell, but i can tell you guys a litlle bit about myself.

I was born in the 80's in one of the biggest cities in Colombia, went to a catholic private school, after graduating from high school, went to college, took a semester abroad and then moved to bogota and finished my major. I have to admit that sometimes i felt like Elle Woods but i made it!

Should i say im gay, or is it too obvious? I'm single now, had five short relationships, the last one ended in december 2005, never been in love, never been with a girl either, so you might be thinking who does this queer think he is to write about gay relationships? well this is just the story of my journey finding love in a gay world!

Toodles,

Guylian