This saturday is love and friendship day here in colombia, is something like valentines day for the rest of the world. after reading tons of gay guys online profiles it seems that we are looking for friends as much as sex, and bfs.
but is finding a friend harder than a boyfriend?
when i first moved to bogota i hardly new a couple of friends here int the city, and only one was gay, i started meeting new people trough him, but not actually friends, at same time, i was looking for a boyfriend, i used to log on gay.com, gaydarguys.com and all types of websites as well as socialnetworks like hi5.com, after a couple of years i had 3 boyfriends and only 1 friend.
was i looking in the wrong place? maybe, but the real question is what are we looking in our friends?
living in a plastic society, like the gay community, most of the time finding love is like filling a check list, what he wears, how much he earns, where does he live, is he good looking, how is his body, do my friends like him.. and many more. but what about friends? is sad, but is the same! somehow gay guys stop looking for friends that they can rely on, or laugh and cry with.
a friendship according to wikipedia (i cant believe im quoting this) "connotes a relationship which involves mutual knowledge, esteem, affection, and respect along with a degree of rendering service to friends in times of need or crisis. Friends will welcome each other's company and exhibit loyalty towards each other, often to the point of altruism. Their tastes will usually be similar and may converge, and they will share enjoyable activities. They will also engage in mutually helping behavior, such as the exchange of advice and the sharing of hardship"
within the years i found that there a different types of friends, the ones that you fuck and then become friends (fuck buddies), the ones to go to parties and clubs with, the ones from school (study friends), the ones that approach you becuz you have something they want or desire (wannabe friends, facebook friends (you dont even know them) and of course the ones that really cares about you, and want the best of you, the ones that you call your bff, and no matter what they will aways be there to support you.
have a happy love and friendship day, tell your friends how much do you care about them and love them, and remember that at the end, friends are the only ones who stay, boyfriends come and go.
toodles,
guylian
1 comment:
Scott O'Hara, an intellectual author who was also a gay porn star (who would beleive that?) said, "I hate sex. Now, don't get me wrong. I love sex. I hate what sex does to good friendships." Having a friend is the most important "possession" that one can have (except, of course, one does not actually possess or own a friend--friendship is a free gift, that is what makes it so valuable). A friend can be relied on if things go well or not so well. If your boyfriend is truly your best friend, then you have something of inestimable value.
Post a Comment